My books.

 My books. 

OK. Are you at a loose end this morning? Have you had enough of climate change anarchists blocking the M25 in Britain? Have you just had your fill of viruses, their repercussions, the ones who have had the double vaccines and the ones who are still thinking about having them? Aren't you just sick and tired of pontificating politicians with their pointless platitudes? Aren't you screaming at the top of your voice because nobody will tell you what on earth is going on throughout the world? Do you simply wish they'd scrap daytime TV since the sight of wallpaper is infinitely more appealing than being subjected to daytime quiz shows, property auction programmes and endless repeats of old programmes that might have had made you laugh 50 years ago but are now so dated that they should, quite promptly, be re-located to a museum. 

So settle down, put on the kettle and let me tell you about my book. Now, of course you've done your utmost to persuade everybody that you've written four self published books. But hold on a minute. You feel another outrageous self promotion is in the air. Yes there it is just waiting for an announcement through the glories of modern technology.

Now for the purposes of this piece, let me introduce you to my life story and book No Joe Bloggs. Familiarity and repetition may be an underlying theme here but this seems a good a time as any to promote my books. They are the fruits of my literary labours, the rewards for my whole hearted endeavours on the written page and they could be yours if you just want to read an ordinary life story from an ordinary member of the British public. You'll never ever be able to emulate Charles Dickens, Thomas Hardy, Henry James, Marcel Proust, F. Scott Fitzgerald or Joseph Conrad. That would be ridiculous and you'd be entitled to call me a pretentious fool. 

If you'd like some more information on my other books wait no more.  There's Joe's Jolly Japes, my take on social commentary, the Chelsea Flower Show, the Henley Regatta, Polo on the playing fields of  England, chapters on England, West End department stores and the rich tapestry of life. Joe's Jolly Japes is available at Amazon online, Foyles online, Waterstones online and Barnes and Noble online. There's also my first children's book Ollie and His Friends which can be found at Amazon, Waterstones online and Barnes and Noble online. 

No, the fact is that my life story and memoir No Joe Bloggs is my personal creation, my life so far, an everyday account of my childhood reminiscences, affectionate stories about my parents, grandparents, my grandparents and mum as Holocaust survivors, their horrific trials and tribulations and the redemptive years after the Second World War. My references to that whole period are based on nothing but guesswork and hypothesis but they are described in such a way that you hope they pull on your heartstrings. 

Then No Joe Bloggs takes you on a very literary journey growing up in Ilford, Essex, very lyrical descriptions of the West End and London, my wonderful dad's passionate love affair with the West End and of course his lifelong and passionate love of my wonderful mum. In No Joe Bloggs there are chapters on my favourite music, bands, singers and groups from the 1970s, my favourite TV programmes from that iconic era, radio stations, news stories from that tumultuous period and celebrities from Britain and the USA.

When all is said and done No Joe Bloggs is the story of an Autistic individual who, diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome roughly 20 years ago, can still smile, laugh, dance, love, appreciate, be immensely grateful and express his opinions. And for that reason alone yours truly wants to say thankyou so much if you have a copy of No Joe Bloggs and if you could kindly leave a review of my book on my Amazon page, that would be great.

So where were we? Oh yes. My detailed account of my life story No Joe Bloggs. It's funny, moving, life affirming, nostalgic, descriptive, uplifting and full of heartfelt sentiments. There are some very whimsical references to a fictitious and imaginary account of my late dad going to Las Vegas and fulfilling a lifelong dream of playing the gambling casinos with the likes of Sammy Davis, Tony  Bennett and Frank Sinatra. 

At the beginning of my book you can't help but talk about your personal connection to the 1966 World Cup in England, which, by some coincidence, England won so dramatically. My grandfather, bless him, cut the hair as a barber of the famous West Ham trio of Bobby Moore, Martin Peters and now Sir Geoff Hurst. Now there's a claim to fame. Yes, the three West Ham and England representatives would regularly patronise the barber shop my grandfather worked for in Upton Park, not a million miles away from the ground itself. 

Then you go into what must be, in my opinion, is an amusing and affectionate homage to the 1970s British football teams throughout that glorious epoch. There are the 70s footballing giants including Arsenal, Liverpool, Everton, Manchester City, Manchester United, Ipswich Town, Aston Villa, Wolves, Spurs and Leeds United. My analogies may make you chuckle and giggle. 

Within the first few pages there's my homage to my childhood home of Ilford, Essex. Here is chapter and verse of where it all began on the pavements of Ilford, charging around the back roads thrillingly on my lime green bicycle with stabilisers, accompanied by the sound of the ice cream van whose sweet melodies would ring around the suburbs. 

So there you are Ladies and Gentlemen. My life story No Joe Bloggs is available at Amazon, Waterstones online, Foyles online, Hatchards online, Barnes and Noble online and Angus and Robertson online. You can also see and hear about further details about my book on two You Tube channels. Click on Joe Morris and No Joe Bloggs and you'll find the first chapter of my book as read by me and another from an Australian journalist named Nicola who very kindly offered to promote my book on her foreverautobiographies.com website. Thank you. Nicola. You'll find a full description of an interview she did for me highlighting all of the salient details of No Joe Bloggs on another You Tube video.

Once again thankyou so much for reading this blog about my life story. You've made a very ordinary man very, very happy. Without any more bias, No Joe Bloggs is a cracking read, honest, open, insightful about the precious possessions of our life such as good mental and physical health. My health has always been vitally important and precious to me. The love, understanding and wonderfully supportive wife and family who continue to provide can never be emphasised enough. Oh thankyou my lovely family.