Far East cruising holiday and travelling

 Far East cruising holiday.

We all know that travelling the world can not only broaden our horizons but it can also take you to far off distant lands that years and years ago would have probably seemed unimaginable. How often did we think that a simple journey to Majorca, Benidorm or the Costa del Sol, Costa Brava or Blanca would now develop into a thriving and highly lucrative tourist industry that could sweep us off our feet and take us much further than Spain or Italy?

We must have felt like pioneers or trailblazers because little did we know it at the time but, within the space of a couple of decades, the very concept of going on holiday abroad would assume a radical facelift. Suddenly we were on another continent in another remote corner of the world where the time differences were entirely different and the locations were even more stunning than we could ever have dreamt of  in our imagination.

And so it was that my lovely wife Bev and yours truly have just returned from one of the most delightful, magical and spectacular holiday for many a year. Some of us were convinced that nothing could ever match the timeless Latin beauty and splendour of Brazil a couple of years ago but how wrong we were. It was our cruising holiday of a lifetime, a holiday that none of us would ever have believed possible way back then. 

We've come a long way since those halcyon days when both the BBC and ITV would give us a tantalising insight of packaged holidays to Spain that set us back the princely sum of £30 for 10 days in Majorca in circa 1974 with bed, breakfast, lunch and tea thrown in for good measure. And that included everything. As a kid you felt enormously privileged to be part of this great crusade, this exciting journey into the unknown. You were wandering around Luton airport at some unearthly hour with your lovely mum and dad and brother brimming with anticipation and wondering about what would happen next.

It only seems like yesterday since this wide eyed kid from a quiet suburb of Essex in Ilford would climb the steps of a Monarch aeroplane at breakfast time and embark on the most enthralling adventure into the Iberian peninsula. None of us knew what to expect and for a while it almost felt like some breath taking adventure into some country that you'd only heard about on elaborate TV advertising campaigns or the multitude of travel agency brochures available on the high street.

But then the likes of Cliff Michelmore on the BBC holiday programme or Judith Chalmers and Chris Kelly of the commercial ITV Thames channel would invite themselves into our living rooms. Chalmers and Kelly's programme was called Wish You Were Here but this had nothing to do with 1960s rock band Pink Floyd whose album title had exactly the same name. The Holiday programme and Wish You Were Here were our breezy introduction to Spain, our definitive guide book and learning curve into a world of fun, easy living and completely uninhibited enjoyment.

It was a world occupied by glamorous looking hotel bedroom balconies, pin ball machines in the main reception areas, warm sunshine that was guaranteed and the type of food and drink that none of us had ever seen let alone tasted. It was a world of bullfighting day trips, sangria tasting, excursions to caves, astonishing avenues filled with cafes, restaurants and bars, historic buildings in new territories and so much more. We were flabbergasted and once my mum and dad had settled my very young brother and your self by the hotel swimming pool, the day was our oyster to misquote another cliche.

And then it was that in your naivete and ignorance that you spent the best part of the day sunbathing in Benidorm, hour after hour of exposure to the unrelenting rays of hot tropical sunshine where the temperatures poolside would almost nudge 100 degrees Fahrenheit. By the end of the day some of us were red as beetroots or British post boxes, burnt as the traditional steak and crying out for soothing Calamine lotion that would reduce the severity of the pain our skin was quite clearly feeling.

In those days of course we had no idea how quaint and innocent those holidays were at the time. Some of us loved to swim for most of the day while my lovely dad would caress the discerning ears of the British tourists with a tape of Herb Alpert's melodious trumpet. We hardly moved at all from our position near the sun loungers which may have been accepted as the norm. From time to time, though we might have considered a gentle stroll around the local shops but then decided it was much easier to chill out and relax.

But almost 50 years later and our tastes and habits have changed to such a dramatic extent that even a holiday to Spain in May may be snobbishly dismissed as unadventurous. Now we have the disposable income to jump onto a plane or sail from a cruise vessel in the sure knowledge that countries like Japan, the USA, Brazil, Argentina, Australia and India are very much the fashionable di rigeur on our holiday itinerary.

We think nothing of travelling to exotic global locations where there are more palm trees than ever before and everything seems so much bigger and slightly overwhelming. The height of holiday culture and luxury is the Seychelles, Maldives, the Borneo rainforests, Bahli, the Caribbean, the Bahamas and Barbados, deserted islands surrounded by tea and banana plantations and former British colonies where the latest news may have to be relayed by the BBC World Service.

So with that thought in mind my wife and I left on our latest cruise vacation to the Far East, a place we'd only known as a result of revealing documentaries on the TV. We knew that the distinguished broadcaster, journalist and reporter Alan Whicker had opened our eyes up to geisha ladies wearing colourful kimonos and junk boats bobbing buoyantly by the quayside in some Hong Kong idyll. We were now living that dream, fulfilling it and then discovered that there was much more than met the eye. 

There were the local customs, the polite, deferential behaviour, the impeccable manners, the delicate tea drinking ceremonies and then the religious sanctuaries where everything was quiet, simple, undemanding, almost charming and, above all, immensely enjoyable as well as being insightful. There were the solicitous and attentively caring porters who carried our suitcases and bent over backwards to help us whenever assistance was required, permanent smiles on their faces.

My wife Bev and I landed in Bangkok on the first leg of our over a fortnight on the Norwegian Jewel cruise vessels almost beside ourselves with inquisitive natures and convinced that it could hardly get any better. For the best part of half a day we strode around the streets and roads of Bangkok and then just bombarded with glorious symbolism and mesmerising sights. But then we realised that it would probably have taken us the best part of the year to visit every single attraction that Bangkok had to offer and just absorbed everything and anything that made us smile and laugh. 

So there we were in Bangkok, taken aback breathlessly by bold, beautiful and eye boggling advertising hoardings, electronic interactive images that flashed and dazzled almost incessantly. Bangkok was simply a giant endorsement for everything that was commercial, instantly pleasing to the eye, immediately accessible and just gargantuan. The cynics might have called it vulgar, materialistic and garish but those were not the thoughts that entered our minds.

After a relaxing boat trip, we disembarked at another port for yet another river boat experience in the heat and darkness of another blissful day in the land of the mystical Orient. Wherever we looked there were the familiar red lanterns which will shortly be gracing the streets for the Chinese New Year. We proceeded to sail down a river helping ourselves to a lavish buffet. By now it all seemed barely believable but in the land of the rising sun we felt like honoured guests at some royal banquet.

And then there was Vietnam. The tragic catastrophes that have now befallen Vietnam are now well documented. There was the obscene savagery and bloodshed of the Vietnam war where much of the 1960 became the most horrendous killing grounds ever seen in recent history. We visited the famous tunnels of Vietnam where thousands of soldiers once hid with terror on their faces. We were told that those with any respiratory disease were not to be allowed or not encouraged to go into so we didn't. The one abiding image and sound of Vietnam of that first visit was that of the deafening gun fire and shots from a shooting range but this was beyond fascinating.

Our following day in Vietnam was dominated by religion. For most of the day we were guided around by gorgeous temples and seemingly hundreds of Buddha figures in gold. Now we were in chocolate box territory, our eyes transfixed by Buddhas decorating both inside the shrines and outside as well. Time was when this was the way it had always been for centuries. The fragrant smell of incense and joss sticks drifted past our sensitive noses, small tendrils of smoke curling gently into the air. We were then allowed to take as many photos as possible and the opportunity seemed too good to turn down.

And then it was the turn of Thailand, simply one of the most remarkable and memorable of experiences. Firstly it was another day of marvellous museums, more Buddha temples and thousands of tourists slowly immersing themselves in holiday paradise land. By the end of our day we thought we'd seen everything a holiday could offer but then one of the many outstanding highlights emerged and it was simply unforgettable.

Arriving in Phuket, our guide took us to some distinctly disappointing and underwhelming jewellery shop where quartz and diamond were displayed quite prominently. It felt like one of the most pathetic let downs of the holidays so far. Besides who goes all the way to a jewellery shop in Thailand when London can boast the ultimate displays of jewellery in Hatton Garden? But we persevered with Phuket because we knew what we were about to experience.

Just after lunch our coach stopped off an elephant sanctuary that just left my wife and I speechless with astonishment and wonder. A small group of elephants were just waiting for us to arrive and we knew would never let us down. There was Sidney, the baby elephant who stole our hearts, Grandma with her noble and imperious air and the playful Lucy who some of us wanted to embrace lovingly for the entire day. Now we got down to the serious business. Before we knew it we were mixing rice and chewy dough like substances and that's when we knew that nothing could ever match this sensation. And yet it did by a country mile. 

Soon we were being confronted with buckets of unpeeled bananas, thick sticks of sugar cane and everything to leave our elephant friends completely satisfied. These elephants were just ravenous but their appetites were simply off the scale. Every so often elephant tongues would loll out languidly and just swallow up as much food as it was possible to eat. This became a source of huge amusement to the visitors and we, as tourists, could hardly have believe what was happening to us. But that indeed had been a day to remember for the rest of our lives.

After a brief visit to seductively romantic stop off in Singapore, my wife specifically insisted we visit the famous Raffles hotel. Here many a classic author from the early 20th century had laid down their hats just to savour the rich baroque furniture, the marble columns and the restaurants that would probably have set you back a second mortgage had you thought about investing. There was the celebrated Singapore Sling, the poshest of cocktails, the five star treatment, the significant air of art deco and plush magnificence, the majestic history that now left us spellbound.

And then there were several more visits to Malaysia, exquisite Malaysia the one country in the world that some of us must have thought we'd never ever get to visit. This ticked off your bucket list of dreamscapes. Once again we witnessed yet more Buddhas but on one of our final days some of us genuinely felt as if you'd never again witness something that was so spiritually uplifting.

Lowering ourselves into a speedboat we sat down and then for whatever reason, raced at frightening speed across a river for a spot of island hopping. Now to say that some of us felt as our whole life force had been sucked out of us would be a gross understatement. You weren't quite sure how to react but at frequent points in our journey the top and bottom of your body felt like a washing machine being spun and bumped around at almost bewildering speeds. Your stomach was by now half way between Hong Kong and Japan but hey this was part of the fun. So we ventured to some forested adventure trail with thousands of steps where an elusive lake proved too far to travel. And then there was roughly half an hour on some sandy beach where we drank coconut juice. It sounds good, doesn't it and it was brilliant.

And then we were treated to what felt like the most amazing experience. We were now taken to the king's palace in Thailand. What happened to us next was entirely unexpected and wondrously surprising. Our tour guide had told us that the king of Thailand was about to go for a drive around his kingdom. So we were told to move to the side of this palatial building as King Abdul of Thailand glided serenely out of his residence in a small but perfectly formed palace. What an afternoon and what a day.

In a blink of an eye and finally there was the capital city of Malaysia. Kuala Lumpur means the river meeting mud and it was just a golden vision before us. We got out of our tour guide's car and stared up at  the kind of architecture that any other city throughout the world would be proud to be associated with. The Twin Towers is just the most extraordinary structure, a towering, glittering homage to wealth and finance. It was so tall and visually astounding that adjectives and metaphors would do it scant justice. Next to the Twin Towers were yet more buildings that soared beautifully into the blue summer sky of Kuala Lumpur, an Asian jewel that seemed priceless.

On our plane back to England we began to reflect on our cruise to the mystic East and were almost speechless. It was everything and more that we'd ever hoped it would be. At an airport in Malaysia we gathered our thoughts and out of the corner of your eye, dawn broke softly over the Far East. You reached out for yet more superlatives but then decided that life was and always would be sweet.