National Cheese Day

 National Cheese Day.

Today is one of those days with a very specific texture and flavour. For most of us cheese represents something that has been regarded as essential on any shopping list at the end of the week. We'd probably be craving this food if it had been somehow forgotten. And yet there it sits in the fridge comfortably rubbing shoulders with the butter, the milk, the yoghurts, the mayonnaise quite possibly and a dear old sandwich be lost without it. It's cheese, cheese, cheese and smile for the camera.

A couple of weeks ago, the good people of Gloucestershire witnessed one of the funniest, quirkiest, silliest and yet the most remarkable of yearly cultural events. It was dotty, potty, absurd, shocking to those who may have never seen it before and just inexplicable. But it did take place without any last minute hitches or technical problems. Middle England wallows in its peculiarities, its out of the ordinary rituals and, once again, we were neither disappointed or surprised. 

What followed was the annual cheese rolling race. Now the cheese rolling race is one of the daftest sights you're ever likely to set eyes on. But every year, it just unfolds before our disbelieving eyes, the most incredible manifestation that almost defies explanation. So off they all went, intrepid, fearless souls taking part in a mass participation activity or, if you do take it seriously, sport at its most fiercely competitive. 

High on top of a hill in this most royal of counties, seemingly hundreds of folk gather en masse, primed and ready to go, refreshed and revitalised by a quick pint or two in the local pub and facing one of the craziest challenges. For this is quite clearly madness personified or maybe its perfectly sensible, harmless and inoffensive. It looks frightening, nay less terrifying but these daring enthusiasts just love to be out in the open on a late spring day. The British countryside is swaying in the bright sunshine and the human race has always challenged itself to the limit. 

But yes folks. It's National Cheese Day. You're impressed aren't you? It's something you've always wanted to be reminded of because cheese has been around for centuries. We venture into our supermarkets every day whistling a tune and going about our way quite happily. Now let's see. Don't forget the jam, bread, vegetables, the meat and fish, the cereals, the dog or cat food, the sweets and chocolates for kids and the the family sized bags of crisps, the fruit of course, all of those savouries and indulgences we take for granted. 

Then, suddenly, you realised the necessity for cheese, that lovely slab of yellow dairy sustenance. But where does the fascination for cheese come from, its irresistible appeal  when lunch demands it.  Did it occur to the farmers of the world that the cows who so generously provide us with the milk and the calcium from our favourite Hereford animals could be converted into something so nutritious and wholesome.  Then there was the light bulb moment? We'll take that milk, allow it to curdle before going off. 

Then we'll allow the milk to curdle, go hard and bob's your uncle. In no time vast slabs of cheese appear on our dinner table in a ceramic dish. Now way back when, a large brick sized cheese would sit snugly on the dining room table, right next to the bottle of tomato ketchup, also flanking the salt and vinegar cellar. Ah how satisfying is cheese? So what's your favourite cheese? Or perhaps you've no preference as such because it comes with pies, omelettes, melted, grated, kids strips, salads or just something that's bound to take your fancy after a lavish Christmas Day turkey feast.

Now most of us love nothing better than a good, old fashioned early evening helpful of cream crackers, plenty of margarine or butter and, of course cheese. There's the reliable Cheddar, the scintillating Stilton, the mouth watering Red Leicester, the Double Gloucester, the delicious crumbly Irish cheddar, Gorgonzola, Brie, Camembert, cottage cheese, goats cheese, Edam and cheese with salad dressing or another blob of mayonnaise. It's a most succulent and deeply appealing combination. 

During the 1970s, the middle classes or upper classes would meticulously organise cheese and wine parties. Nowadays cheese and wines are, quite probably a dated anachronism, a throwback to a time when those with the disposable income would happily part with money for those little sticks and several hundred cubes of pineapples. There was something cheerfully pretentious about cheese and wine parties because it was a symbol of wealth, influence and your lofty position in high society. In other words you'd arrived and you were entitled to such harmless luxuries. 

Back in the mid 1970s, the BBC's Play for Today featured Allison Steadman in the TV classic Abigail's Party. In a slightly embarrassing moment during a polite, well mannered party, there was a painful silence. If memory serves you correctly, Ms Steadman glided around the coffee table and asked her guests whether anybody liked the Greek singer Demis Roussos. So the turntable was employed and there was music. Presumably Steadman had already offered the obligatory cheese and pineapple sticks to grateful party goers. 

Now of course the upwardly mobile and the professional lawyers, merchant bankers, doctors and well heeled economists probably devour vast quantities of vol au vents, or those tiny sausages that take at least one bite to eat, although the wine, be it red or white, is carefully chosen according to its vintage. Maybe they'd plump for a latte, a cappuccino, espresso or the straightforward tea or coffee. But cheese invariably makes the party swing and should never be excluded.   

So folks, let's mark National Cheese Day. The brilliant plasticine characters Wallace and Gromit, as created by the supremely gifted Nick Park, once again emphasised the tasty virtues of cheese, a gastronomic delight. Cheese Gromit and Gromit agrees immediately. So they slice off another piece just to finish off the evening meal but, according to our eminent dieticians, you'd probably pile on the pounds and stones if you eat too much of it.  But hey, it's time to make a cheese sandwich with maybe a pickle or chutney for good measure. Enjoy your cheese and don't forget the mayonnaise.