Monday 11 May 2020

Boris Johnson- latest medical bulletin.

Boris Johnson- latest medical bulletin.

It was billed as one of the most heartwarming, poignant speeches ever delivered by a Prime Minister. It was the most passionate oratory ever heard from one politician in ages and it had to be because if didn't tick the right boxes then we'd have all been in trouble. It had all built up to this one moment. We were all waiting with bated breath, hanging by his every word, sentence, paragraph, listening to  that very eloquent, confidential address to the nation. We were hoping and waiting, enthralled and fascinated, expecting reasonably good news and then ever so slightly frustrated that it wasn't quite the one we were expecting.

So it was that Prime Minister Boris Johnson straightened his tie and shirt collar, had the briefest of conversations with his suit and gave the whole of Britain the latest update on future medical developments with that very businesslike and suitably serious air as befits the status of Prime Minister. He was frank, confessional, clear, concise, fluent and ultimately very persuasive. He did what he had to do because he, more than most, would have known exactly how the nation felt when his life was endangered and yesterday he then pulled it off with devastatingly impressive class.

There was a very real sense of professionalism about Johnson, an air of utter command and control that must have communicated itself to the nation in that most comforting way he has about him. Maybe he doesn't convey that impression all the time but on an occasion that demanded both gravitas and weight Johnson seemed to have the finger on the pulse of a nation that had so obviously felt the pressing necessity for it.

Last night in the traditionally elegant and opulent surroundings of a Downing Street broadcast friendly room, Boris Johnson sat down on his chair, stared very honestly into a TV camera and poured out all of his innermost thoughts, measured the mood perfectly and then settled into the most intimate of fireside chats in much the way that his illustrious predecessor Sir Winston Churchill had done 75 years and two days ago.

Surrounded by chandeliers, several beautifully upholstered chairs in another room, what can perhaps best be described as a white stucco fireplace and the most stunning sofa, Johnson clenched his fingers tightly together and prepared himself for another historic moment in the political history of Great Britain. There are times when the future destiny of a country can never be accurately predicted since the unexpected and suddenly dramatic may have other plans. This is one such time and this can never be more strongly emphasised.

Johnson then became very expressive, forthright, straight talking and, for a while very animated. He would engage his audience with bunched fists, every so often striking out with jerky arm movements, short, sharp jabs that reminded you of a welterweight boxer at the height of their career. But this was no act of ferocious pugilism because Boris doesn't really do aggression. Johnson is more or less a cunning strategist, never pulling his punches as such but still searching for a decisive knockout blow.

And yet on the most improbable evenings of all, Johnson set out the most peculiar and unconventional narrative many of us will get to hear. Once again he resorted to almost art nouveau language and the kind of rhetoric that some of us would never thought he would ever utter. We all know that the evolution of the English language is always fluid but yesterday evening took the biscuit.

Johnson set off on the most exciting journey where the bumps in the road will still be painfully felt but this is one adventure that he felt and we feel must end with a happy ever after story. Johnson told us about this wonderful road trip with several stops at all the relevant motorway service stations, a quick Costa coffee and a very tasty Ploughmans roll with just a dash of mouth watering chutney.

Johnston went on to condense all of the things he wanted to say in punctuated bullet points, three entirely separate stages that would encompass three very concentrated periods of the rest of the year. For the next couple of days he felt Britain was more than capable of taking vigorous exercise in local parks and sitting on park benches which, for some of us, came as an absolute relief if only because some of us are emotionally exhausted by the recent pleas and warnings. We are perfectly alright of course but there are only so many times that your ears can be exposed to the same old themes over and over again.

On Wednesday the green fingered enthusiasts will finally be able to pop down to their local garden centre if only to pick up that longed for bag of manure, some precious packets of seeds, a couple of very decorative plants for the hallway and an ornamental fish pond just for good measure. Then there are the very colourful camellias, the richly attractive rhododendrons and just a smattering of hydrangeas. Once again we will be deservedly re-introduced to our gardens because we do need that much coveted hose-pipe for the grass and that grass could do with another lawnmower.

Sadly though it does seem to some of us that the other two steps are still shrouded in mystery. Of course the Boris speech to the nation was very articulate and powerful, of course we knew what he was talking about and we did get the gist of it. But steps two and three seemed to get slightly muddled by vague time lines and a complete lack of specific dates.

We were told that we could return to work, school or university at some point in quite possibly June. But there were so many caveats and conditional circumstances that occasionally you found yourself willing the Prime Minister to announce dates and times rather than guesswork and wishful thinking. You can go fishing for a while as from Wednesday but only if you promise to keep as far away from your partner as possible. You can play tennis with a friend but only if they're immediate family and you have to stick to household members of your kith and kin.

But here's the thing. You are now allowed to go back to work but only if you're quite happy to set out on the walk of a lifetime or perhaps the bike ride of your life. There can be no train expeditions and the bus may be your only other means of transport. So that's how this one works but only for the time being until we sort out the best way of finding this elusive vaccine. But don't worry the wheels of motion are underway and by the beginning of this autumn if not sooner we'll be back up and running. You bet we will.

There are also those small businesses which are beginning to show signs of wear and tear, deteriorating rapidly and going down hill horribly. Still, there are chinks of light at the end of the cliched tunnel and before you know it, London's glamorous shops, vast department stores, furniture warehouses, haberdasheries, car mechanics, engineers, bridge builders and construction workers could be poised for action sooner rather than later. Even the postman or woman and milk man or woman will whistle their way down your path with the utmost conviction. Not that they haven't been doing so anyway.

We have now reached July and now is the moment when the cafes, restaurants, probably the much loved cinemas and theatres  will ring their cash tills as if they've never been away. However, that sounds like months away which indeed it is but time may be beginning to feel like a lifetime for some. How much longer can Britain survive without its pint of best bitter, the pub quiz machines, the pub quizzes, the Sunday roasts with family and friends and all of the pleasantries that came with those weekly public gatherings.

Still, eventually we'll get to see our lovely families and friends because we've missed their company, the homely conviviality of it all, the morale boosting laughter, the need to be among parents, our grandparents, our comedy pals, the knockabout humour. There is a sense now that the tentative first steps of the Boris road journey is rather like that A to Z atlas you used to keep under the dashboard or under the front seat; reliable, helpful and just there. It's time to take another sharp intake of breath, strap on your seatbelt, close your eyes and just chill. Good times must lie ahead.

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